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August 14, 2008

Chris Thile, Dolly Parton Scandal

“She’s my f—ing soulmate, dude” says Thile to pal

[EDITOR’S NOTE: It has recently been called to our attention that no part of this article is even barely true.]

MANHATTAN — New York has been abuzz all summer with rumors stemming from the Chris Thile, Dolly Parton scandal.

Thile, the highest paid player in major-league bluegrass, has reportedly told buddy and bandmate Noam Pikelny that Dolly Parton is “my f—ing soulmate, dude.”

A surreptitious camera caught the couple at the Station Inn in Nashville singing a thinly-veiled tribute to their new love.

The association between Thile and Parton began in the early part of this decade, when Thile played mandolin in the bluegrass band fronted by the musical icon, former sex symbol and occasional actress.

Obvious erotic tension suffused that band, which eventually broke up amid allegations that Parton, 62, had taken the virginity of the young mandolin prodigy.

After a several year remission, the scandal flared up again this summer when Thile was spotted leaving a surreptitious rendezvous at Parton’s Tennessee mansion.

Thile’s romantic partner, a NYC designer and musician, at first devastated by the revelations of Thile’s infidelity, has recently been seen at the West Village gastro-pub the Spotted Pig on an apparent date with rocker Lenny Kravitz.


One Response to “Chris Thile, Dolly Parton Scandal”

  1. How Do Those Bluegrass Guys Play So Fast - The True Story! « More to Come…The DJB Blog on October 10th, 2008 8:25 pm

    […] get a kick out of the Intelligencer.  The editor’s note under the headline about the Chris Thile/Dolly Parton Scandal which says, “It has recently been called to our attention that no part of this article is even […]

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